Yesterday one of our friends and neighbours unburdened his feelings to us about the manner in which some of our mutual neighbours react to one another.  Uncivilly, to say the very least.  Although, generally speaking, this is a street where many people know one another and acknowledge one another as neighbours and valued personal contacts to whom they express sympathy when it is required, congratulations when that is appropriate there are some among us who shun their neighbours.

One mightn't think that living directly beside others for over two decades would result in such cold indifference, but with some people this is exactly the prevailing attitude.  Our good neighbour bemoaned the fact that despite their properties touching and their long propinquity, the family living directly beside us, sandwiched between his house and ours, is comprised of insular and moody people who go out of their way to avoid acknowledging the presence of others.

When emerging from his house and he encounters the man of the house, or sees him while walking on the street, this neighbour will go to extremes to avoid coming face to face with someone he has lived beside for over twenty years.  Sometimes averting his face is not enough; overtly crossing the street to ensure their paths do not cross directly is also employed.  And when he sees the son, now 18, jogging on the street and he pleasantly greets him the son too turns his face away, expressionless, without a sound, obviously emulating his father.

That he is speaking of a man who will go to great lengths not to encounter another human being in his hermetic mindset that embraces social insularity, someone who would never come to the aid of another person, someone who would not offer a $1 tool to a neighbour, is well enough known to the entire street.  That dour, miserable countenance is one his own wife has become familiar with in the most intimate of ways, and the paradox is that she is a bright, outgoing personality, swift to smile and greet and befriend others.  That she has been able to live with this controlling, civil-averse man for so many years is the true mystery.

We commiserated with our neighbour, emphasized that it was nothing personal directed toward him, that this attitude that he deplores that one he comes up against constantly is experienced by others as well; reminding him that he has other neighbours upon he can rely for friendly support.  But this is a man who affably greets strangers because he has an open and friendly character, and it is difficult for him to separate another person's mean social temperament from a personal affront against himself.

In the same token, on a personal scale, I think often how needed it is for us to affirm to those among whom we live our appreciation of their presence.  For women in particular, I feel that other women should make an effort to express their admiration of them and support of them.  Little compliments go a long way to helping other people feel better about themselves and how they are perceived by others. 

And it requires little effort on our part to extend those modest enough expressions of appreciation.