Thursday, November 8, 2018

People need to talk. To someone who will listen. Not critically, not to judge, not to interrupt, not to make suggestions, not necessarily to commiserate, but to, as they say, ventilate, to relieve themselves of some emotional burden. Most people, when they're faced with another in need will do their utmost to relieve others of an emotional burden that doesn't involve them in any way, out of sheer kindness, but that is if they're aware of the turmoil that is roiling another person's psyche.

It is that awareness, it is that propensity to feel for the other that makes us human. And because we're human we need validation of that very fact, at times. And often it can only come from a connection made with another human being. Not necessarily one who is well known, a family member, a friend, but at times, just about anyone who will lend an ear and simply allow the other to talk unrestrainedly.

No interruptions required. One just simply listens, quietly. Reassurances may be pointless within that particular link between two people. But a calm reception is quite the point.  Consider  yourself an empathetic listening board. It is, in fact, what you have become in the subconscious mind of the person who is speaking in an emotion-laden rush of words. The interaction is a two-way one, even when you're quietly listening and saying nothing. The occasional nod of encouragement is permitted.

Eventually the concerns that had so weighted and discouraged the person who is speaking will seem less of a burden to them, though the reason for their emotional trauma may be intact. But the relief valve had been opened and drained and allowed the entry of a calming effect to fill the vacuum that resulted. You've been the unwitting focus of a drowning, and in your silent acquiescence to absorbing someone else's concerns and fears you have accomplished a needful deed, become a life buoy.

You can go your way and wonder at it all, and let the words that encapsulated another person's trauma slide away. That other person will get on with their lives, slightly more equipped to deal with the burden that darkens their expectations of life. Sometimes it's just right to respond to a need and the need that people have to speak of some inner anguish to release the pressure valve of anxiety becomes your task, though you may have nothing whatever in common with either the speaker or the concerns expressed.

And then, you just get on with life.

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