A major highway has been blocked by bumper-to-bumper traffic, vehicles full of desperate people on a mission. They are all anxious to arrive at a certain destination. A haven, a place where they will feel safe from whatever impending disaster threatens their safety and security?

A train derailment that has spilled impossible amounts of toxic chemicals whose fumes are even now, reaching the panicked people waiting in their vehicles for traffic to move?

News that Ebola virus has stricken some returning travellers from West Africa and has inexorably begun its spread throughout their community, hospitals unable to cope with the epidemic?

A terrorist attack that has destroyed nearby government buildings and with news circulating that the terrorists, apart from the several who blew themselves up in the effort, are planning another such attack within the same community within the next few fateful moments?

A disastrous flood caused by the pelting non-stop rain events that have taken over the upper atmosphere and drenched everything in sight, causing the mighty Ottawa River to overspill its banks in a manner never before seen, and threatening their community, everyone evacuating in expectation that things can only get worse?

Panic has embraced Ottawa.

Thousands of shoppers attend Tanger Outlets grand opening on Friday, Oct. 17, 2014. CTV

And the reason? The opening of a new shopping mall. This important event in the history of the western reaches of the city, Kanata, has incited people to converge en mass toward the mall for the critically important, exciting adventure of -- shopping. People are consumed with -- shopping.

Highway 417 has become impassable. Police are warning other motorists to stay off the highway. Motorists are being encouraged to make their way, if at all possible, to Canadian Tire Centre, where there is ample parking space in between extravaganza shows and sports events, from whence a bus can be boarded to take them to the new plaza.

Oh Ottawa!

The mind, truly boggles.

Natalie Pierosara @NPierosaraCTV 

Drivers tell me they've been waiting an hour to get off the 417 @TangerOutlets Ottawa. U can park at CTC. @ctvottawa